NewsGator Go! story - Crapping robot toilet paper holder

This is the perfect gift for my husband and all other poop-obsessed folks. "Sweetie, are you ready to leave yet?" "Yes, honey, I'll be right there -  no, wait! My butt is calling again! I have to go sit on the toilet!" I swear to God this conversation happens every day in my house. Scene 2: "Nnnnnnnnngggggggggghhhhh ahhhhhhhhh! Uhhhhhhnnnnnng! Phew! Aaaaaggggh!"

This crapping robot toilet-paper holder manages to signal your literacy, robophilia, and deep commitment to bowel evacuation, all in one simple package. Bravo!

Newspaper reader - toilet paperholder (Thanks, Alice !)



Boing Boing:
http://www.boingboing.net/2008/12/19/crapping-robot-toile.html

What part of "intellectual inquiry" didn't they understand?

College Bans Nietzsche Quote on Prof's Door :: Inside Higher Ed :: Higher Education's Source for News, Views and Jobs

I'm thinking maybe it's the "intellectual" part. Individual words, by definition context-free, push the buttons* of irrational fear-based lifeforms.

* or pull the triggers, trigger the detonators, ...

You know I love you back.

Slate's presidential election soundboards: John McCain and Barack Obama. - By Christopher Beam, Andy Bouve, and Jim Festante - Slate Magazine

This is enough to make me re-up my Skype subscription. Hm, how can I make some of these part of my answering machine message?

in-freakin'-credible

South Carolina sheriff buys tank to conduct raids - Boing Boing

Too bad Bull Connor's not around to shake this guy's hand and borrow his toys.

"Words will never hurt me" -- suuuuuuure

Caught in the grips of linguistic paranoia - The Boston Globe

When I was a graduate student (in French), a nice young couple from my church asked if I would teach their toddler some French. Completely ignorant of SLA for children - in fact, pretty much completely ignorant of children, since I had no brothers or sisters and had never babysat -- I said sure.

They invited me over one afternoon to hang out with their little girl and see how we bonded. I was being trained in the only-use-the-target-language-in-the-classroom religion, but I knew she would need a hook to hang what I said to her on, so I opened up one of her picture books and pointed to a picture of a dog. "Un chien," I said, smiling.

She wasn't having any. "Dog!" she replied, because of course that was what the thing WAS. Four legs, long ears, wet nose, wagging tail equaled Dog for her and nothing else.

We went back and forth a little, with me trying to suggest that Long-Ears could also be called "un chien," and finally, exasperated with me, she slammed her fist down onto the open book and screamed, "DOG!!!!!!!!!"

People are funny that way about the language they speak. It's not only our identity that is bound up in our language, but our very universe. "The words we use are strong. They make reality," as Wang Chung said. If you come along and tell me that my reality is not your reality, or is not the only reality, or may not even BE reality, I'm very likely to sock you in the nose just as my young friend did with the book.

Of course, as a language professional, I'm absolutely committed to multilingualism. I also happen to think it's a lot of fun. But it's worth bearing in mind that more is at stake in America's linguistic naivete than identity.

Fwd: Animatronic zombie that rises out of your garden and chases people, dragging its entrails

The Fright Catalog's Dead Fred runs on two 12V battery and sports four separate motors that allow it to sense passers-by, rise up out of the earth and chase them, howling and growling and dragging its entrails behind it. It's $2650, so it's a little pricey for Hallowe'en, but that sum does compare favorably with the total cost of ownership for a pet dog or cat, so when the kids start complaining that they need a companion who'll follow them around and do tricks, this might be a good choice. Dead Fred Zombie Chaser (via DVice)

 

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Coffee Chain Drops 20-Ounce Drinks

<p>A Chicago-based coffee chain called Intelligentsia is doing away with 20-ounce coffee drinks. The company's Chief Executive Doug Zell tells the <em>Chicago Tribune</em>, "Drinking our coffee is not like drinking jug wine."</p><p><a href="http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=92398779#email">&raquo; E-Mail This</a>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <a href="http://del.icio.us/post?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.npr.org%2Ftemplates%2Fstory%2Fstory.php%3FstoryId%3D92398779">&raquo; Add to Del.icio.us</a></p>

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=92398779&ft=1&f=3

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In search of the penis thieves

Several months ago, I posted about the capture of 13 "penis thieves" in the Congo who allegedly stole, or shrank, their victims' members. In the June issue of Harper's Magazine, Frank Bures tells of his travels to Africa in search of the penis thieves. During his quest, he riffs on the idea of "culture-bound syndromes" and "the interplay among culture, mind, and disease." From Harper's Magazine: Wasiu, Bad Teeth told me, had gotten on the bus and sat down next to this woman. He didn't have a watch, so he asked her what time it was. She didn't know. Then the conductor came around and asked her for her fare. She didn't have that either. As she stood up to get out of the bus, she bumped into Wasiu.

"Then," he said, "Wasiu Karimu felt something happen in his body. Something not right. And he checked and his thing was gone."

"Was it gone," I asked, "or was it shrinking?"

"Shrinking! Shrinking! It was getting smaller."

And as he felt his penis shrink, Wasiu Karimu screamed and demanded the woman put his penis back. The conductor told them both to get off the bus, and a crowd closed in on the accused, not doubting for an instant that the woman could do such a thing. But as soon as she saw trouble coming, Bad Teeth said, she replaced Wasiu's manhood, so when the police took him down to the station, they thought he was lying and arrested him instead. Penis thieves (Harper's Magazine, thanks Vann Hall!)

Previously on BB:
• Accused penis thieves captured

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/332180791/in-search-of-the-pen.html

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Building festooned with inflatable tentacles

DeviantArt's FilthyLuker produced this fantastic be-tentacled building installation somewhere in France with collaborator Pedro Estrellas. FilthyLuker's terse description: "Octo-pied Building: a house with tentacular cancer." Link (Thanks, Fipi Lele!)

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/330919582/building-festooned-w.html

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Fwd: Lawn zombie sculpture

Begin forwarded message:

Date: July 8, 2008 8:52:30 AM CDT

Subject: Lawn zombie sculpture

Source: Boing Boing

Author: Cory Doctorow

Over on Boing Boing Gadgets, our John's dug up this magnificent zombie lawn-sculpture by Alan Dickenson, available for a mere $90 -- think of the savings you'll realize by no longer having to pay someone to keep the kids off your lawn! Link, Discuss on Boing Boing Gadgets
 

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Fwd: Octopuses play with Rubik's Cubes

Date: July 8, 2008 1:28:56 PM CDT

Subject: Octopuses play with Rubik's Cubes

Source: Boing Boing

Author: David Pescovitz

Researchers from the Weymouth Sea Life Centre are providing octopuses with Rubik's cubes to determine whether the animals prefer one tentacle over another, or another, or another, etc. I bet they secretly hope that one of the animals will solve the puzzle. From Nature's The Great Beyond:

"Uniquely, octopuses have more than half their nerves in their arms and have been shown to partially think with their arms," says Claire Little, of the Weymouth Sea Life Centre. "Many animals have been shown to favour a certain arm so we will see if octopuses can be added to that list."

According to Little, the findings could help make life in captivity more pleasant for these intelligent, (and occasionally shark eating), animals. "They are very susceptible to stress, so if they do have a favourite side to be fed on, it could reduce risk to them," she says.

Octupus and Rubik's Cube (Nature)
 

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Fwd: Teen discovers bat hiding in her bra

Begin forwarded message:

Date: July 8, 2008 12:37:44 PM CDT

Subject: Teen discovers bat hiding in her bra

Source: Boing Boing

Author: David Pescovitz

Abbie Hawkins, 19, spent a half-day at work before noticing that a baby bat was hiding inside her bra. From The Telegraph:

Miss Hawkins said she got dressed at 7.30am and arrived for work at the Holiday Inn Norwich North, near Norwich International Airport without noticing anything unusual.

"When I was driving to work I felt a slight vibration but I thought it was just my mobile phone in my jacket pocket," she said.

It was not until her lunch break, at midday when she felt a strange movement inside her bra, which had been hanging on her washing line the previous night.

Bat in bra (The Telegraph, via Fortean Times)
 

Read more…

Giant chicken sculpture photographed in various locations

<img src="http://www.boingboing.net/200806261030.jpg" width="480" height="320" alt="200806261030.jpg" style="float:left;" /><br clear="all" />
<p>Gallery of photos of a giant plucked chicken sculpture.</p>
<blockquote>
Attention Chicken! is a three dimensional version of the collage that goes by the same title.

<p>Nicolas Lampert and Micaela O'Herlihy created a ten-foot rotisserie chicken out of polystyrene foam, hard coated, and then painted with latex paint and final coat of high gloss varnish.</p>

<p>In October, 2006 Attention Chicken! made a number of unannounced public interventions throughout Milwaukee at Bradford Beach, the woods, Walmart, National Ave, and other locations throughout the city. Reactions ranged from laughter to attacks directed at the chicken (three in one day!)</p>
</blockquote><a href="http://machineanimalcollages.com/Pages/Installations/AttentionChicken.html">Attention Chicken</a> <em>(via</em> <a href="http://wtbw.net/"><em>wtbw</em></a><em>)</em>
<br style="clear: both;"/>
<img alt="" style="border: 0; height:1px; width:1px;" border="0" src="http://www.pheedo.com/img.phdo?i=0cb7a3ae41ddf03301f51fdace295433" height="1" width="1"/>
<img src="http://www.pheedo.com/feeds/tracker.php?i=0cb7a3ae41ddf03301f51fdace295433" style="display: none;" border="0" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>




<p><a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~a/boingboing/iBag?a=7ECnBu"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~a/boingboing/iBag?i=7ECnBu" border="0"></img></a></p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~4/320692276" height="1" width="1"/>

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/320692276/giant-chicken-sculpt.html

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Voyeur hid cell phone in rear - Boing Boing

Voyeur hid cell phone in rear - Boing Boing

Can't touch this.

Or, as my daughters would say,

Peace, punch, Captain Crunch,
I got something you can't touch.

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http://lonelysandwich.com/post/38527410/why-me

Why indeed. This is one of the most elegantly written blog posts I've ever seen, on any subject. It certainly is persuasive and sends little chills up my spine.

Gadget in Japanese public restrooms masks sounds

Japundit shot a video of a gadget called "The Magical Water Princess," which is installed in women's public restrooms to mask sounds of using the toilet. [A] device called Oto-hime ... makes a chirping sound when ladies use the toilet, because Japanese women hate the idea of anyone being able to hear any sounds they make while they go. Before the device was introduced in the 1980s, it seems that female patrons in restraunts would flush the toilet multiple times to mask the sounds, which wasted an incredible amount of water...

Here's a video of how they work. Just wave your hand over the button and the sound of water will come out of the device, allowing you to do whatever you need to do with without nervousness of people listening to the sounds you make. Link

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/303914343/gadget-in-japanese-p.html

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Terror in NYC after toad venom love drug kills man

Health officials in New York are cautioning people to avoid a "street aphrodisiac" made from the excretions of a poisonous toad, after a man consumed the illegal concoction and died. The city's poison control center issued the warning Friday after receiving a hospital report that a 35-year-old man who ingested the hard, brown substance died earlier this month. The product is sold under names including Piedra, Love Stone, Jamaican Stone, Black Stone and Chinese Rock at sex shops and neighborhood stores. It is banned by the Food and Drug Administration.

City health officials said the victim, whose identity was not released, was admitted to the hospital complaining of chest and abdominal pain. He died two days later. Health officials said the hardened resin, made with venom from toads of the Bufo genus, contains chemicals that can disrupt heart rhythms.Link to AP item, more on a NYT blog here.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/298837776/terror-in-nyc-after.html

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Scott Adams writes about his great cat

Dilbert.com - The Official Dilbert Website with Scott Adams' color strips, Dilbert animation, mashups and more!

My cats are great, too.  I know your cat is also the greatest cat on earth.

Too many of my cats have gone before us to the Great Litterbox. None of them, alas, was as much of a tribal elder as Scott’s Sarah. I have to find out what he’s feeding her and who her vet is.

This one's for you, Cherubino. And you, Elie. And you, Figaro, Katarina, and Priscilla. And you, Clarissa and Princess Dory. And for you, Miss Kitty, and you, Spit and Taffy. And for you, Mac and Zamorna. I'll try to put together a photo tribute soon.

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Getting baked before shooting AKs at the Taliban: a bad idea.

Wired defense technology blogger Noah Shachtman says, Smoking weed can improve your performance in all sorts of activities -- from playing reggae music to watching Battlestar Galactica to writing blog posts.

If you're an already ill-trained, semi-motivated soldier in the Afghan Army, however, spliffs are a particularly poor way to prepare for battle, as this little clip illustrates.. Link to post, which includes more happy fun stoner warfare video goodness. Hey, how do you say, "Duuuuuude... what?" in Pashto? Your answers welcomed in the comments.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/277798848/getting-baked-before.html

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Why we're powerless to resist grazing on endless web data

Lee Gomes of the Wall Street Journal writes that recent research shows that a brain rewards itself with a squirt of natural opiates when it comes across new information that requires interpretation. That's why, he concludes, people stay on the Web for long periods of time. What is it about a Web site that might make it literally irresistible? Clues are offered by research conducted by Irving Biederman, a neuroscientist at the University of Southern California, who is interested in the evolutionary and biological basis of the human need for information.

Dr. Biederman first showed a collection of photographs to volunteer test subjects, and found they said they preferred certain kinds of pictures (monkeys in a tree or a group of houses along a river) over others (an empty parking lot or a pile of old paint cans).

The preferred pictures had certain common features, including a good vantage on a landscape and an element of mystery. In one way or another, said Dr. Biederman, they all presented new information that somehow needed to be interpreted.

When he hooked up volunteers to a brain-scanning machine, the preferred pictures were shown to generate much more brain activity than the unpreferred shots. While researchers don't yet know what exactly these brain scans signify, a likely possibility involves increased production of the brain's pleasure-enhancing neurotransmitters called opioids.
Link

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/250380263/why-were-powerless-t.html

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Hairstylist shoots complaining customer

Lauren Newton, 28, of Washington, Pennsylvania, was getting her haircut at her stylist's home on Thursday when she complained about the way it looked. So the hairstylist shot her. Newton is apparently doing OK while the hairstylist, Monique Reed, is in jail on charges of aggravated assault and reckless endangerment. From the Associated Press: Lauren Newton, 28, was getting her hair cut Thursday at the home of Monique Reed when the two began to argue about the style, police said. "She (Reed) went to the bedroom, got a gun, fired a shot in the ceiling," Police Chief James Blyth said. Newton, who was trying to flee with her sister, was then shot in the lower back, he said. Link (via Fortean Times)

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/248992993/hairstylist-shoots-c.html

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Zombies in TX on Night of the Living Dead's 40th

Man, it took me long enough to clean up the code that got transmitted along with this post from my mobile phone. Guess I won't do that again any time soon.

This one goes out to all my zombie-loving medieval-beast-fan friends.

Amy Cottrell says,


I just taped a large "zombie walk" yesterday in north Texas. It was in honor of the 40th anniversary of Night of the Living Dead. There were over 100 people dressed as zombies walking down a busy street in front of a mall. I got some great pics and a video, which I posted here. They were actually walking up to a local horror con, which had George Romero and the entire Living Dead cast as guests. A good time was had by all.

BlackBerry Desktop Manager Coming to Mac? Let's Hope!

OK, so we have to mark this as pure speculation and rumor right now, but when I read the following forum post I just couldnt help but get warm and fuzzy feelings inside (and Im sure all you other Mac users will feel the same way!) and just had to share it in the blogs:

"RIM working on a program for Mac users
Hi all. Spoke to a T-mobile BB rep yesterday and he told me that the BB rep was just in there and let them know that RIM is working on a new Desktop Manager for Mac. Finally!! Also, he doesnt know when it will be ready, but RIM feels that more people are going toward the Mac and so they feel its worth it to come up with a DM for the Mac. Lets hope its for real!!"

I hope this rumor turns out to be fact, and sooner than later. Its one of those things you just know someone at RIM MUST be working on. CTIA is coming up at the end of March...man o man would that be a great announcement from RIM - BlackBerry Desktop Manager for Mac. My fingers are crossed, though Im guessing its more likely to be announced at CTIA 2009 vs. 2008. :-)

http://crackberry.com/blackberry-desktop-manager-coming-mac-lets-hope

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Kansas high school official: woman "cannot be put in a position of authority over boys"

St. Mary's Academy (25 miles northwest of Topeka) won't let women referee boys basketball games. The Kansas State High School Activities Association said referees reported that Michelle Campbell was preparing to officiate at St. Mary's Academy near Topeka on Feb. 2 when a school official insisted that Campbell could not call the game.

The reason given, according to the referees: Campbell, as a woman, could not be put in a position of authority over boys because of the academy's beliefs.
Link

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/235107745/kansas-high-school-o.html

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Wiener poopie ransom note for Jesus

Jean Mansel of Kent County, Michigan called the news media last month after an 80-pound cement Jesus statue was swiped from her front yard and a ransom note left in her mailbox. The ransom note read, "We are holding Jesus ransom until you clean up the poopie from your wieners and trust us we see you take your wieners for long walks without picking up their poopie in our yards. This has upset us dearly so please clean up all the weiner poopie, if you want to see Jesus unharmed. Sincerely, Lindy Lane Residents." The story was featured on CNN. The statue has since been returned. Apparently, it was not taken by a neighbor, but rather a family member. From WZZM13: "It has to be a young person because they put these lines around Jesus, no adult is going to waste their time doing that," (Mansel said before the statue was returned). "And referring to weiner poopie…my gosh."

Jean has four wiener dogs and admits there was a complaint last year about their leavings. But she says she's cleaned up every pile since.

"I take my dogs for walks; I carry a plastic bag with me and pick up anything that they do. I thought something like that would be safe in our yard, it wasn't, it wasn't."
Link to YouTube video, Link to WZZM13 article (Thanks, Naomi Pescovitz!)

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/231085682/wiener-poopie-ransom.html

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me 935 times, ...

From the San Francisco Chronicle of January 30, 2008:

"[T]here is something truly special about Bush 43. Something so unique, so poisonous and strange that historians are busy right this minute rewriting not only their books, but their entire way of thinking about how we measure and interpret political malfeasance."

In some ways, my head has actually shut down. So much has happened, both nationally and on a much more local level, that I seem to live in a quasi-permanent state of denial, of intellectualization, of all the coping strategies our minds can devise to cushion the utterly appalling.

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SMS opens public toilets in Finland

From BoingBoing

To unlock the door of one of the roadside toilets along Finland's freeway system, you now have to send it a text message with your mobile phone. The toilets have been secured, and a sign outside explains that the user just sends the word "open" (in Finnish) to a short code and the door will be unlocked remotely. The company managing the service will keep a short term record of all users phone numbers, simply so that if the toilet is then damaged by criminals, they can be traced by the police.

"Open"? That's all? Such a wasted opportunity for creative scatology. Why not "got2P" for example? Oh wait, that one only works in English. How many characters do you suppose there are in the Finnish word for "open"?

IfGodforbid your phone is out of battery or something, you'll have to use the big bathroom.

Lead me in thy righteousness.

Every believing home needs a Threat Alert Jesus! "For it is Thou, Lord, only, that makest me dwell in safety." No sh!7, Sherlock.

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